Teenage autobiography

Unprepared for my Chemistry Test,
I write the answers down and weight is lifted off my chest.
I pull it out with my papers,
And the thrill of cheating is finally savored

It might be wrong, but this is my song.

I’m having fun and grab a beer.
I start to dance and I begin to cheer.
I sip it down but drink it slow,
And watch my confidence begin to grow.

It might be wrong, but this is my song.

The chairs are set and the circle is formed.
I sit back easy as the smoke starts to swarm.
My eyes are squinted and my head is heavy,
And I go for a midnight Cruz in my best friends Chevy

It might be wrong, but this is my song

I’m feeling dizzy,
His body is warm but mine is chilly,
As he does what he is dared.
I set my head back to hide that I am truly scared.

It might be wrong, but this is my song

I stand in front of my father,
With my best friend, or that’s what I call her.
I lie by omission,
As I go to the party without his permission.

It might be wrong, but this is my song

I live my life with no regret,
I try to swallow my pride and forget,
That I have made mistakes,
But the pain from sinning still aches.

This all might be wrong, but this is my teenage song.

mebesee

I'm sorry, I am not me.
I'm not the person i came out to be.
If you look deep enough, you shall see,
the real, real me.
Not the person i try to be.
Like threw the teenage eyes i see,
but they are not me.
Nor the person I'm suppose to be.
& one day I'll see,
the person i call me.
At happiness I'll be,
because then i will finally see,
the person i truly call me.

Sincerely, your mind.

So I was sitting, or laying in my bed. Trying to sleep when my brain just couldn't stop talking. You know those thoughts that randomly spring forth, and you try to not think of them like its thoughts that you really don't want to think about. For me, it was my prgenito fat belly and my last hook up. We spent seven house together and ruined it in ten minutes of upstairs unsatisfactory. And an awkward "My dads on his way." I mean I seriously want to invent a time machine to take me back so i can maybe gather enough balls to say no. But see the thing is i always have a hard time saying no. For some reason when things are leading to another i cant help but go with my sexual instincts, but every time i regret. And i know that its fucking up my mind. And possibly when I'm older I'm going to blame all my hook ups from hell on someone i really truly love and push him away... Like the movies and sad stories. But when I'm alone with another guy...its hard to say no. Its just me and him, in which seems like a weird setting. Were getting into it and it only seems natural to continue. To go to the next step. There is just somethings that seem natural, and hooking up unfortunately seems some what natural. I mean the guy cant be gross or I cant be too drunk. But for those times when its just you and him. And things have gotten hot. I don't really understand the point of saying no. Its natural. Love isn't an aspect when it comes to sex. Chemicals take over your body and make you do things you wouldn't normally due or say. So why do people take sham to those who suffer from a black moan? When they are only doing what is natural, like drinking alphas pure h2o.

Inside look on a Chubby Teenage Mind

Counting Calories? Please tell me. Why did Sir alpha give people the idea of making so called fating foods if he didn't want people to indulge? I just had a cookie. From panera. And I feel like shit. Not because it wasn't good. Just because I know that its not heading for my ass.. but my semi gross stomach. Every bite I took I could feel the fat being added. It makes me so upset that a teenager like me...who's not made to be as skinny as Paris but has to obsess over her body. I exercise and work out, but I also eat whatever I want. I mean I don't go to mickydees and order a big mac..but when I'm hungry I don't eat a single carrot. Why should I live to please America? Why is every one so obsessed with being paper thin? Why cant guys like a little chubby ness? Why does the bigger girl not get guys? Uggh. Alpha made it. So why did he make minds of teenage boys who want little ass motherfucking paper thin anorexic girls the thing to date? Like wtf? Its not fair. I have a black body, but the face of a white girl. So my body if frowned upon because it doesn't look like my friends. What about my personality? What about the fact that I'm the most chill out of my friends? But for some reason they would rather call them when they want some ass then the girl that they would smoke a blunt with? Due to the fact that my body isn't as appealing as my anorexic looking friends i am forced to move to the friend status? Rather then the sexy hot friend? Not all guys are like that...i mean black guys Love the sexy hips and ass. But I'm not really down with the ghetto talking guys. Id rather be in the hills then in the Bronx's. Sip to fine wine then chug a forty. I mean maybe its just a phase. Or whats in... like bell bottoms and heavy eye shadow. But doesn't history repeat its self? Should i wate until I'm older... when it seems like things don't really matter. Or should i loose twenty pounds and stop eating so I can be that anorexic girl, instead of being that somewhat chubby girl that's not known to be sexy.

Ferment That Mr Goviee

Ronn Roberto's gets you fucked up. So I'm a teenager who isn't scared to admit that fact that she drinks(alky) quite frequently at that. Being in a unfamiliar feeling is fun to me. I mean yeah i could "enjoy life with out drugs." But what for? Once in a while its good to be someone else. And drugs and drinking is the closest thing alpha lets us. Yeah, i mean its gotten people killed, raped, and humiliated. But its those dumb ass people that take shit too far. I believe Mr alpha made the Drink of fermentation so people can enjoy things in a different way. Not that so called nattuuaaall way that gets boring... especially for us teenagers. And because the fore fathers did it, us teenagers do it too. Us juveniles learn from the past. And now the government wants to reprimand us for what they did? Does something seem wrong with this candy coded picture? I mean maybe if there were other things...or sober things that us teenagers could use as an alternate. Butt No! See bowling gets old and movies are only good when your ten or forty. Because us Teenagers know about bootleg. So you put us threw school and 1:49 on a Friday when the weekend is finally here. What is there to do? Sports are a gateway...I'm not going to deny that. But what happens when the final point is scored? Another thing is not everyone is capable of playing a sport. And some are not as smart as everyone else. Or wealthy? So when the day turns to night. And all the alternatives get old... what shall us teenagers do but PARTY?!! a sober Friday nights is frowned upon in this great teenage American lifestyle. So we buy a packy from a high school drop out, or a townie parent, and we drink. we drink until the feelings get numb and the hidden personality is revealed. And we loveeee lifeeee. We stumble around and say weird things. But we are out of our element. We are taken for a wild ride of alcholism. We exceed the drunken feeling and persuade the smiles and laughter that seems oh soo natural. So what if we drink too much. Or do stupid stuff. We are living in a life that can only be developed by that sweet sip of alphas fermentation.

This is what I have to say

Verdana has always been my favorite font. Its not to big, or to small. Its perfect. Unlike my life. Well is anyones life really perfect? It pretty much seems so in my town of North Attleboro. Everyone seems to be just a tad bit or alottabit more perfect then me. I'm a zebra in a some-what small town of white toned Irish people who has a body and a form of an unheard Asian dish. I have to consider why I'm here. Why the "alpha" (god) has put me into this kind of predicament. I feel like something is missing in my life... like this isn't it. I wake up and sleep without changing the world or inventing a new type of medication I just live in a fucked up environment we call the United States of America. I'm not a guanine genus. I'm not drop dead gorgeous. I'm not a natural at my "favorite" sport volleyball. But I try to be all these things. But why? So I can get up the next morning and try to be something I'm not? It's quite unsure why I'm here. What I'm doing. But one can only live there life day by day not knowing whats going to happen next. And for some reason i feel like i should know. I don't want to waste my life finding out. And waiting. Growing and living just like everyone else. I just don't want to grow, learn, and make babies. I WANT MORE! I want to live my life my own way, and not follow the regular "lifestyle" of a human being...